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Offline Planter  
#1 Posted : 22 March 2023 06:35:14(UTC)

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I propose to post jokes and humor here in order to relax a bit after working in a garden humor.

As well as providing a giggle, these garden puns and garden jokes are funny caption inspiration for when you’re sharing pictures of your garden, plants or flowers on social media (my post on nature hashtags will also help you here). Pass them onto your green-fingered friends too!

  • A toddler was found chewing on a slug. After the initial surge of disgust, the parent said, “Well, what does it taste like?” “Worms,” was the reply.

  • Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

  • What kind of tree can fit into your hand? A palm tree!

  • Why shouldn’t you tell a secret in a garden? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!

  • Hard work doesn’t harm anyone, but I do not want to take any chances.

  • The only way to ensure rain is to give the garden a good soaking.

  • Weeds grow at precisely the rate you pull them out.

  • Nothing ever looks like it does on the seed packet.

  • Autumn follows summer, winter follows autumn, drought follows planting.

  • However bare the lawn, grass will appear in the cracks between the patio paving stones.

  • When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

    The real meaning of plant catalog terminology:
  • “A favorite of birds” means to avoid planting near cars, sidewalks, or clotheslines.
  • “Grows more beautiful each year” means “Looks like roadkill for the foreseeable future.”
  • “Zone 5 with protection” is a variation on the phrase “Russian roulette.”
  • “May require support” means your daughter’s engineering degree will finally pay off.
  • “Moisture-loving” plants are ideal for landscaping all your bogs and swamps.
  • “Carefree” refers more to the plant’s attitude than to your workload.
  • “Vigorous” is code for “has a Napoleonic compulsion to take over the world.”
  • Knee: a device for finding rocks in your garden.
  • “Annuals” mean disappointment once a year.
  • Hardy plant: really means “hearty” to wildlife and a wholesome meal.

humor 2
humor 3

Edited by user 22 March 2023 07:56:21(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

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